Myth-Chief by Robert Asprin & Jody Lynn Nye

Author:Robert Asprin & Jody Lynn Nye [Asprin, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Fiction, Fantasy, General, Adventure, Science Fiction, Fantasy fiction, Humorous, Epic, Skeeve (Fictitious character), Wizards
ISBN: 9780441016877
Publisher: Berkley Pub Group
Published: 2009-01-27T05:00:00+00:00

NINETEEN

"There's no problem with deficit spending."

—R. MUGABE

Hermalaya held out one slender hand to the choconut tycoon. He took it in his big paw, looking dazed and pleased.

"Mister Oatis, it has just been a pleasure?" she said.

"Oh, no, pretty lady, the pleasure was all ours!" he exclaimed. "What a day!"

Nunzio, Chumley, and I had all of her ceremonial gear locked up in their respective cases. Massha stood beside the princess, an honorary lady-in-waiting. We all had the system down to the point where we could get the Cake room cleaned up in under half an hour, including magikal deep cleaning, thanks to a trumpet-shaped gadget Massha had unearthed in a wizard's estate sale in Plupert. Sebellum Oatis's nine children were lined up wide-eyed and quiet, waiting for their chance to say goodbye to the princess.

"I don't know how you did it," Oatis's wife whispered to her, "but they've been good all afternoon! And all with a few little pieces of cake!"

"It's not what Cake is," Hermalaya said, smiling. "It's what Cake means."

"I know. You have triumphed over such adversity thanks to Cake. I read it in your diary. I bought a dozen copies for all my friends!"

"Well, that's just so kind," the princess gushed. "I mean, I didn't want to share my private thoughts all over the dimensions? But Skeeve here told me that a lot of people would find the story moving? I kind of guess they have."

I grinned a little sheepishly. The publication of The Princess's Diary had been a hard sell with Hermalaya, but I had pointed out she had already given copies not only to Massha's friend Bobbie Jo, but also several of the clients who had requested them as mementos after their Cake ceremonies. I suggested that she find a good publisher who would present the princess's own words in her voice, all the better to drum up support for Foxe-Swampburg. She agreed, but only for the sake of her kingdom. It had sold thousands of copies already. Bunny was keeping track of the royalties.

"... I wish I could take lessons from you. And I think my two older daughters are interested, too."

"Maybe later on, when things get settled out?" Hermalaya said, grasping her hand courteously. "I just love children, you know. I'd be happy to help you all on the path."

"I admire you so much, princess."

"Thank you. You're just too complimentary?"

"Uh, here," Oatis said, offering me a box. "Thanks."

The goodbye looked like it was getting protracted, so I grabbed Hermalaya's arm.

"Sorry, but her highness is getting tired."

"I'm sorry, but we have to go?" Hermalaya said, taking my cue. "You are just all so kind."

We hadn't even bamfed out of there before the herd of children started clamoring and running around. I felt sorry for Oatis's wife. But it was another two hundred and fifty gold coins for me—I mean, the treasury. Oatis found Hermalaya charming, but he didn't have any economic hold on Reynardo or Foxe-Swampburg that was of any help. He did, however, have some friends who had.

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